Grey Matters Archives - Star Observer

GREY MATTERS: Should There Be A National LGBTQIA+ ‘In Memoriam’ Website?

Peter Benn — Fri, 20 Mar 2026 03:38:13 +0000

The online daddies dating profile shared some unexpected news… “Dear friends of Jonathan, I inform you that my much loved partner has died peacefully after a long illness. He is ...

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GREY MATTERS: At The End of 2025, Here’s Our Quarter Century Gay Report Card

Peter Benn — Mon, 15 Dec 2025 05:45:22 +0000

Now that we’ve reached the end of the first quarter of this century, how does the gay report card look? In 2000, just three years had passed since Tasmania decriminalised ...

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GREY MATTERS: Venturing Out

Peter Benn — Mon, 13 Oct 2025 00:35:51 +0000

Venturing Out is the October edition from our fabulous monthly Grey Matters column, by Peter Benn. We older gay men venture out of our homes for: 1) necessities like food ...

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GREY MATTERS: Embracing Sexual Freedoms

Peter Benn — Fri, 06 Jun 2025 06:41:36 +0000

In this month’s Grey Matters column, Peter Benn discusses the nuances of sexual freedoms in the era of same-sex marriage. Same-sex divorce is now happening. And what I hear is ...

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GREY MATTERS: Sex Ed for Everyone

Peter Benn — Sun, 04 May 2025 01:28:16 +0000

‘Sex Ed for Everyone’ is the May edition of the monthly column Grey Matters. As a generation, we have failed our young people when it comes to gay sex education. Our generation had ...

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GREY MATTERS: The Deep Importance of Vintage Photos

Peter Benn — Tue, 11 Mar 2025 06:14:47 +0000

I’m intrigued by the B&W or sepia vintage photos of males together in various states of clothed affection. They indicate that male bonding has been around always — at least ...

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GREY MATTERS: Today’s Older Gay Man

Peter Benn — Tue, 10 Dec 2024 06:23:46 +0000

This is my 50th Grey Matters column. Being nearly 25 years into this new century, I think it’s doubly time for a snapshot of today’s older gay man, and our ...

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GREY MATTERS: National Coming Out Day, and What It’s Like Being Outed

Peter Benn — Thu, 10 Oct 2024 23:54:13 +0000

In this month’s Grey Matters column, Peter Benn discusses National Coming Out Day, as well as the nuances of coming out and his lived experience of being outed. My coming ...

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Gay Dating Apps Are For Everyone

Peter Benn — Tue, 30 Jan 2024 05:51:08 +0000

Recently, my dating/sexual experiences have segued into areas I’ve not previously experienced – and they all reflected the sexual loneliness of city-based men in their early 50s. The first man ...

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Note To My Younger Gay Self During Pride Month

Peter Benn — Mon, 13 Feb 2023 23:22:58 +0000

It was April 1968, and as an awkward young adult not long in the city from my rural upbringing, I was having an employment interview for a foot-in-the-door office job. ...

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NUDE BEACH MEMORIES

Peter Benn — Tue, 03 Jan 2023 02:23:39 +0000

“Lordy, Miss Molly, just look at all those poor boys who can’t afford swimsuits.” Some thirty years ago, our mini-entourage of four arrived at the isolated gay nude beach. Sexually ...

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Swapping Icons for Heroes

Peter Benn — Fri, 19 Aug 2022 04:57:16 +0000

Judy (Garland, that is, would have been 100 years old this year). Judi (as in Dench, is 87) and Jude (as in Law, 49). These entertainers are all icons of ...

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Touched By A Stranger, For All The Right Reasons

Peter Benn — Mon, 23 May 2022 10:09:41 +0000

As sexually active gay men, bodily fluids and nudity are part of our playground. We know that occasionally s**t happens, fingers get inserted into pleasure zones, and in anonymous sexual ...

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TELECASTING MARDI GRAS

Peter Benn — Fri, 08 Apr 2022 23:06:44 +0000

This year’s Mardi Gras telecast was a stunning live party event. A celebration and public relations exercise that highlighted the size, diversity, and complexity of the LGBTQI community. The ABC ...

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Co-Living Might Be The Answer For The LGBT Community

Linc Jenkin — Thu, 07 Apr 2022 22:31:57 +0000

Leading on from the Star Observer’s piece earlier in the year questioning if older LGBTQI folks are being forgotten about, the concept of co-living was brought into focus. What happens ...

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Retiring To A Seaside Town? Check Out Your Gay Support System

Peter Benn — Tue, 15 Mar 2022 22:25:24 +0000

“I can’t stand another freezing Melbourne winter. I’m heading north to the sunshine.” So said my late-sixties single gay friend, Howard*, as he made plans to auction his apartment. With rigid determination, he then headed ...

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Blinkered Urologists Need To Be Re-Educated About Gay And Bisexual Diversity

Peter Benn — Sat, 12 Feb 2022 21:57:16 +0000

It’s happened again! Yet another married friend, this time, David*, has had his sexuality ignored by his urologist following a diagnosis for prostate issues. In his early seventies, he has ...

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Sex, Summer, and Conservatives

Peter Benn — Tue, 11 Jan 2022 06:33:58 +0000

Increasingly conservative values are threatening the easygoing summer lifestyle of the gay man. It is holiday time again, where hot weather skyrockets the libido, and nudity and outdoor sex become ...

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Lamenting The Gay Christmas Card

Peter Benn — Tue, 14 Dec 2021 06:53:39 +0000

I greatly miss receiving printed gay Christmas cards in the post. In the 1990s and 2000s, every overseas holiday also meant buying more cards from shops like A Different Light, ...

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